worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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