do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
