but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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