There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
