Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(406): View more from Montana

That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.

Fav 25 5116 1190
share tweet
(651): View more from Minnesota

i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.

Fav 10 3709 990
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(862): View more from New Jersey

My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job

Fav 56 5186 1752
share tweet
(682): View more from Texas

why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?

Fav 5 1426 4458
share tweet
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.

Fav 2 2314 1334
share tweet
(720): View more from Colorado

As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.

Fav 4 1835 800
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(757): View more from Virginia

Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.

Fav 14 1787 852
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(913): View more from Kansas

My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.

Fav 0 705 445
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(778): View more from British Columbia

He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.

Fav 3 20 52
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT