Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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