"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize