Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
ttyl tear gas
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
They are going to name an STD after you.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
