Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
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