Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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