This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
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