Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
