So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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