i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"