Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
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