Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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