If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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