we have officially lost it.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Sorry my hands just texted you
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Randomize
