I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Randomize
