At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize