Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
