I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Randomize
