K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Randomize