btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
