I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate