I should be sponsored by Trojan
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
