dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
