Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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