i was rollin on her like bob the builder
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Randomize
