thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Randomize
