he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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