It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
