Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
she peed on how many people?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
