Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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