i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
