You made me cry and you don't even care
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Randomize
