This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
