You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
