i just made my gag reflex go away.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
