dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize