Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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