yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
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he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
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Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?