What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I think your dad took our porno
My dad just said "fuck circus"
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Randomize