she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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