i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize