Kareoke will never be a sober sport
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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