no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Terrible idea I love it
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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