I'm laying in your front yard are you home
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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