I want to have your abortion
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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