WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Randomize
